I have nothing to write actually . Still I am writing because I have nothing better to do . I don’t even have flies to kill, contrary to the popular belief here(it is a popular saying in my native place that people kill houseflies when they have nothing else to do). Though my eccentric monitor is threatening to spoil the party (it keeps becoming blurry time and again and then I have to restart it !) still I must confess that I am having a good time right now . The scheduled class(part of my office training) was postponed and so at the moment I am totally free . Another reason for writing this one is that it’s been more than a month since I posted last in this blog (I posted in some other blogs though) .
The weather in Bangalore also seems to be as moody as the monitor . It was raining some times ago . Now the sun is shining brightly . It reminds me of my capricious roommate who for some unexplainable reasons changed our newspaper from TOI to Deccan Herald , thus denying me my daily crosswords and the sizzling photographs of Ban galore Times . The problem is that he is the earliest riser in the room and he is the only person who gets to meet the news paper guy every morning .
Well I can see that as I am progressing a pattern is being developed in this aimless gibberish . The moody monitor reminded me of the weather and the roommate . But now I am tending to deviate . I actually wanted to write about my starvation for quizzes . I still solve those online quizzes but I am really missing those real time quizzes of my college . To be fair it is the only thing I miss as far as my college life is concerned . By the way this “moody” stuff is not leaving me . Because now one more mercurial personality has come to mind . Quizzing scene in our college revolved around the annual mega quiz in our techfest . It was conducted every time by the mercurial Parnab Mukherjee . Now this person is undoubtedly the most controversial quiz master in India . There will be a lot of quizzers and other quiz masters who would love to hate him . But what I must confess is that he is the most unpredictable and dramatic of all the quiz master I have seen . He used to be the biggest crowd puller in the techfest . A quiz master of the masses . Controversy always attract people . Perhaps that is why he occasionally came up with controversial information like the one about Big B’s first movie (hard core quizzers will know what I am talking about) . He also made the atmosphere charged by occasional satirical outbursts against the ones he hated . Those unfortunate ones included other quiz masters , reigning stars like SRK etc. and also the newspaper Times of India . People always clapped at his remarks , no matter whatever they said at his back . Whatever it is , I enjoyed a lot during those times .
Anyway I can only ruminate those memories now ! Euphoria has turned into nostalgia . Also all my earlier partners are settled in different places . So the web is the only tool for us now . And as I am finishing off , my leisure time is also coming to an end and I am all set to do some real “work” in true sense .

Dreams …..

Sometimes I feel an urge to get lost in the wilderness . I just feel like giving up this ‘good for nothing’ life . Though I can’t actually do it but I dream of such places very often . Perhaps my subconscious mind just tries to provide me some solace while I am asleep .

In the dreams I find myself in the midst of vast empty terrains without any trace of other human beings . I can only see barren expanses touching the sky in the horizon . But I never see the Sun . I always see the azure sky with the Sun covered with white clouds and the golden hue spreading all over . Sometimes I also see the entire sky covered with thick dark clouds and the wind blowing violently and hitting me at my face . Human beings or anything man made never intrude my mindscape during such occasions . Such ethereal imagery gives me an immense sense of ecstasy which I never get when I am fully awake and dealing with the tangible world .

I have always been fascinated by clouds and rains . Even hailstorms act like aphrodisiac for me . That is why such things appear in my dreams so frequently . Also occasional solitude is a good way to regroup and introspect . That is why I find myself in wilderness . But sometimes the urge to escape to the dreamland in reality becomes insatiable and yet unachievable . It actually gives me immense pain and the phantasmagoria ends with the Sun tearing apart the clouds and scorching my face , which turns out to be a reality when I open my eyes and find out that it is already morning .

My escapism leads me to nowhere & only the last part of the dreams remind me of the reality and the unavoidability of it . Dreams remain dreams and I get back to the day to day labyrinth of hope, effort and failure . So I wait for the night to undertake another utopian escape to the dreamland .

An Essay on Nothingness …..or is it ???

I am feeling an irresistible urge to write something . But I am pathetically short of ideas . Nothing mentionable has happened in my life off late . So I am trying to convert this nonoccurrence of event to an event itself . Whoever chances upon this post , is requested not to mind the purposelessness of the topic (or the lack of it) .

The empty mind and empty heart are finally taking their toll . I am so empty nowadays that I am having to find ways to kill time . WC matches are helpful , but not enough .
Surfing sessions also help , but still I am left with a plenty of time and so the oppressed writer within me finally gets a chance to fill up the mental vacuum . Anyway I am trying hard to remember something pleasant and finally I have found something . The girl in the consultancy which mistakenly called us (me & some other fellow strugglers ) for a call center interview ! One of us got a call from them and we reached the place after several hiccups and misdirected misadventures . But then we came to know that we were actually called for a wrong purpose ! Anyway this futile journey remained memorable for me because of that girl with the nosering in the reception . She for some moments kept me spell bound as she inquired our whereabouts . After the confusion was over we came back and as usual I did not have the guts to ask her anything else . But that nose (like that of Cleopatra’s in Asterix) and that nosering still remain vivid in my mind . so I am just trying hard to prevent myself from writing a romantic poem & tormenting the ill fated blog readers further .

I am not sure why am I doing it . Lots of questions are brewing up in my mind . Am I just aping others and joining the bandwagon by creating this blog ? Or do I really want to do it ? Whatever it is , I have finally shrugged off years of lethargy and started my own blog .Let me tell you something more about me for the sake of formality . My name is Jitaditya & I am an engineering survivor in true sense . I have finished my studies recently and currently I am wondering about the options for my future (this the good thing about not studying well , you become aware of your other options !) . The rest of me will emerge with this blog . I have never been comfortable talking about myself . “TELL ME SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF” has been the toughest question I have faced in all of my interviews . So let us see what comes out from this blog .
Thank You .